"Part of you feels a
little special that you get to be there": Kevin
Budnik on SPX, tabling, and other comics-related issues
(photo
by Nate Beaty)
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Kevin
Budnik is a 26 year-old Chicago native who has been sharing his
autobiographical comics with the world since 2010. His work is marked by a
wistful honesty, often with a sense of quiet bewilderment at the passing of
time, of the responsibilities of adulthood supplanting the perceived freedoms
of youth. As I’ve said before, he has a real talent
for capturing the essence of a moment in time, and he can channel angst into
poetry. Furthermore, in his books
and comics like Our Ever Improving Living
Room and Dust Motes (both from Yeti
Press), and self-published items like Flower
Grow, Old Gum Wrappers and Grocery Lists, and the upcoming Handbook, he shares with honesty,
humility, and humor his sometimes shaky recovery from struggles with OCD and an
eating disorder.
Since
Kevin will be officially tabling at SPX this year (9/19 & 9/20), I wanted
to hear his take on all things expo-related, which naturally flowed into talk
about his work and peers.
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Rob Kirby: I’m wondering about your history with SPX: have you tabled there
before? Are you going solo or partnering with a buddy?
Kevin Budnik: I
tabled at SPX last year, sort of. My friend Jen Rickert invited me to put some of
my comics on her 1/3 of a table. It was Jen's idea, because she's the nicest
person in the world, that I could just drop them off and then go walk around. I
ended up just helping her out and sitting at the table with her most of the
weekend. I know a lot of cartoonists don't always feel comfortable trying to
sell their work, but I like being behind the table at shows. It's less about
the sales thing and more about the fact that tabling makes it easier for me to
overcome the social anxiety of being at a huge gathering like SPX. There's a
weird dynamic that is both humiliating and empowering. People come up to judge
your work, but at the same time part of you feels a little special that you get
to be there.
This year I applied to as many
shows as I could on my own (i.e.
without a publisher). I applied to SPX, but didn't get
selected in the lottery. I AM going to be there though!
Before I go on, here's my
armchair philosophy on the application process: applying to cons can be
super-heartbreaking, especially if you're like me and you take everything waaay
too personally. I've heard it equated to that situation in school where they
post the cast-list for a musical, or dance try-outs, or sportsball, for everyone
to see, and you didn't make it. So much of the comics world takes place on this
very personal level, trading zines, or putting your own experiences into these
books that people may or may not like, or even hate. Sometimes it's important
to remember that organizers have a lot on their plate, a lot of people asking
for things, a lot of constraints, and a lot of people coming down the line
expecting to be included. I'm certainly guilty of whining, or existential
twitter-rants when I get rejected from shows, but it's rarely deserved and it's
unbecoming to do this as an artist.
ANYHOO - this year I was
invited to share a space at Zach Mason's
table (along with GW Duncanson, Harris Smith, and Whit Taylor) since I didn't get in on my own. I met Zach (and Matt Trower) last year, at the table I
mentioned (they were the other 2/3). Once again I've found myself in this
situation where the people I've met through comics are just freaking nice, warm
humans, who want everyone to have a spot to show off their work. For all of the
bummer stuff that happens in comics, it's amazing how welcoming the community
can be sometimes. I'm flattered and super excited - mostly to see so many
friends, most of whom I have known less than a year, but feel incredibly close
to! COMICS!
Kirby: I hear you. Comics people are
indeed just generally great. In that vein, tell me five inspirations, off the
top of your head.
Budnik: Cartoonists?
Kirby: Just five inspirations,
artistically-speaking.
Budnik: Okay, I have a few…
1.
John Porcellino. For me the beat
is more important in comics storytelling–the emotional subtext. And in his
stories everything is pared down, there’s not as much exposition. It’s more
about the moment-to-moment. It’s great.
2. Jay Ward, who created Rocky
and Bullwinkle.
4. Craig Bartlett's early “Hey Arnold” strips from Simpsons illustrated
5. For #5 let’s go with my top 5 records right now:
Sleater Kinney–The Woods
Future Islands–Singles
Polaris–Music
from the Adventures of Pete and Pete
Landlady–Upright
Behavior
Yacht–Shangri-la
Kirby: I love that you love Rocky and Bullwinkle – that was one of
my dad’s favorites, and he got all of his kids into ‘em.
Moving on, will you
debuting anything at SPX?
Budnik: This year I'm debuting a new
series of journal comics called Epilogue,
which is based on my life in and out of employment in cafes, but is primarily
focused on how I relate to the people in my life, co-workers, and
relationships. Tonally it's similar to the book Old Gum Wrappers and Grocery Lists, which I self-published between
last SPX and this SPX. I've been posting Epilogue
on my blog, and serializing it in subscription-based zines since January 2015.
I'll have a new issue in September. I've had kind of a busy year. Since I've
been to a few shows since last September each book I'm bringing to SPX might
not technically be considered a debut – but everything will be fresh to this part
of the country. I'll also have the second chapter of Handbook, a 6-part memoir about my dealing with Eating Disorders
and therapy. That series has been incredibly rewarding. I still cope with that
stuff, so hearing people respond to the comics I make about body issues is
mind-blowing.
Kirby: Tell me about the feedback
you've received on those Handbook
comics. Do you feel you're getting them out to people who may downright need to see them? Is part of your
motivation for drawing them reaching out to other people with these issues?
Budnik: So
a lot of my comics deal with my struggle with self-image and physical anxiety,
either in a roundabout or direct way. I've had a few readers reach out and say
that they really relate to the things I've written. ED is a disease of secrecy,
and knowing that other people deal with it is heartening. I think what makes me
want to keep writing about those issues is that it provides a way of admitting
to myself that I'm not alone rather than thinking about writing to reach out to
other people who might be struggling. So, maybe it's actually more selfish than
I let on, like I'm being patted on the back for having insecurities.
That
said, any time I hear from someone who's dealt or dealing with ED in some form,
it makes me feel instantly closer to them. Then I want to compare notes.
Recovery is weird. It never really ends, and can feel really repetitive.
Sometimes I feel like I'm saying the same things over and over, but the
challenge is to keep being sincere and not move backwards in my personal life.
Kirby: One of the hallmarks of the Rob Kirby
Interview for Panel Patter is the
Totally Random Stupid Question (tm). What is your favorite word?
Budnik: Magpie.
Kirby: Wow, did not see that one
coming! (Mine is 'clarity' and John said 'refurbish'. We agreed both words
sound like what they mean).
Budnik: Ha ha, wonderful! I
would've also maybe said 'sesquipedalian'.
Kirby: Okay, I confess had to look that up. You learn things from doing these
interviews. Moving along and wrapping up, is there anything in particular you
are hoping to have happen at SPX this year, anyone you want to meet, etc.? Tell
us your SPX Hopes & Dreams, Kevin Budnik!
Budnik: Wellllll,
I'm honestly most excited to go into SPX knowing a little more about what to
expect. Last year was insane and fun and overwhelming. I met a ton of people
who I've spent the last year forming friendships with, but we're all spread
out, so I'm very excited to have them all in the same place at the same time.
I still feel like
this will be my first time tabling at SPX—I was mostly along for the ride last
year—so I'm nervous as to how it will go with my own space.
I
mentioned that Handbook is six
chapters long - all of those have been drawn, but not yet printed. If people
react positively to this second chapter I hope it'll give me some momentum to
find help printing it, I'd like to get them all together as one book before next
year, but I don't know if I’ll have the resources on my own.
Kirby: We’ll really look forward to seeing you
there, Kevin! Best of luck to you there and to us all!
In the meantime, if you aren’t going to be at SPX, please visit http://kevinbudnik.com and/or http://kevin-budnik.tumblr.com/ for all your Kevin
Budnik needs.
