October 10, 2009

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Trebro Tees Off: Batman: Fortunate Son

Written by Gerard Jones
Illustrated by Gene Ha
DC

[If it seems like I tee off on bad Batman stories so much, it's because I will read just about anything with Batman in it. I admit it, I am part of the problem.]

My friend Noah often tells me not to read something. Sometimes, I don't listen to him. My mistake.

This one goes into the (hopefully) never issued "Worst Batman Stories Ever Told" collection. Bats plays grumpy old man to Robin's whipper snapper, as we are asked to swallow two rather hard to believe ideas at once:

1) That Batman never listens to any rock and roll, to the point of having to educate himself in an archive and
2) That he links Rock and Roll to crime.

Since both of these are preposterous ideas the entire thing falls on its face as Robin tries to come to the defense of a criminal because he likes his music and Bruce makes stupid statements over and over again. If Gene Ha hadn't done such a nice job with the art, I doubt I'd even bothered to finish.

The story limps along for twice its needed length, as the Dysfunctional Duo chase after a deluded rocker who has managed to make his entire fan base into an unruly mob--not with some sort of Joker-backed gas or anything, just because they're young rock and rollers. Kids these days--if you aren't beating the boys with a belt or keeping the girls out of college, they end up becoming young hooligans.

They finally stop the rampage in a decidedly unsatisfactory manner, find out the man responsible, and manage to only take one of the perpetrators of all this to jail. DC should have taken Jones to jail for writing this one. Apparently, the late Archie Goodwin thought this was a good idea. That's a shame, because there's nothing at all good about one. Heed my friend's
advice and stay away.